I often want to tell people what my life is like here in China. Sometimes finding the right words can be harder than you'd think. I set off on this trip over a year ago, with my friend Daniel. We were both in Japan at the time. After seeing Tokyo and Kyoto with him, he returned to NYC. I continued my travels to Shanghai, Beijing, Hangzhou, Suzhou, Harbin, Lijiang, and Malaysia. I've bought my tickets for Thailand in February, where I plan to see to Bangkok, Chiang mai, and Phi Phi island. I will hopefully be in Honk Kong with my cousin for the first week of January.
There are days that are hard here. Days that are unreal to even the imagination. Some days are even, boring. I'm still searching for meaning. Searching for the reason. Searching for the validity. It feels like I've been away a while. It feels like I'm loosing touch with home a little bit. The friends I've made over the years in New York have been distant. I wonder what it will be like when I return to the states. What will their reactions be? What will my reaction to them be? Will we still be friends?
Maybe I've created my own lane by coming to China. Maybe I've run away from one. As I sit here looking at the pictures on the wall behind my computer, I know my experience has been a unique and challenging one.
Trying to fill this page with words, I feel myself trailing off again. Not quite sure of what I'd like to say, or what I want you to know, but somehow I think you still understand.
1 comment:
I can definitely relate. I lived in Asia for the better part of two years myself, and there were certainly days where I questioned why I had left everything behind; there were times were it seemed like a downright stupid decision in hindsight. Having had time to reflect on it all though, I realize a lot of that was due to unrealistic expectations. Simply because I had taken such a leap of faith, I expected every moment to be an life-altering experience; which is never the case. There are boring days wherever you are. I found that everything about the trip, even the days I disliked at the time, created something very special that even I couldn't see until I returned home. I wonder if you feel the same...
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