Today was the day. I didn't have my camera with me, but isn't that how it always works? The unexpected always happens, simply, unexpectedly. I looked up and felt summer. The sun was setting and I looked up. I don't even really know why.  I always walk with my head down in New York City. The buildings always block my view. The lights always drown out the stars. The fumes always cloud my eyes but today I looked up. It was beautiful. Summer arrived in NYC. 

It's like I can't stop my mind from thinking sometimes. Usually all the time. I think it's why I work so much. Why when I'm not working I run. When I'm not running I'm reading, and when I'm not reading I'm..searching. I've been trying so hard to be optimistic these last few months, and it has been working. I've been surrounding myself with good people, not taking things so personally, and really looking on the bright side of things, but for whatever reason this weekend was hard. I felt very alone. Can we ever truly conquer those demons that lurk within us. Will it ever be intrinsic, or will I only feel good when others are actively trying to make me feel good. Is that selfish or realistic?  I always get this way when I read Murakami. 

I wish I had a picture to put up here. I'll be snapping off lots this week. Summer in the city.